Day three of my blog. I have managed to publicise it a bit more, to people outside of my circle of friends. I have just started using Twitter (@notSoFatButBald)and several people have kindly retweeted the blog's web address. I have also pledged to speak out about my illness on the Time to Change website.
A very good friend of mine commented on Facebook about prayer and how I would rather people not bother with it. She made a set of lovely comments. I have taken a quote from it:-
"I guess that's a nice thing cse those that pray see it as a very special respectful thoughtful caring act".
I can't disagree with that in many cases, but I do see prayer as an easy way out for some, as "I have done my bit, now its over to god". I feel that many people use prayer as a way to make themselves feel better, without actually doing anything.
It might seem to people that I am a little hung up over religion/prayer and I guess, in all honesty, I am. I come from a very christian background and because of my atheism, I often feel quite cut off. My family love me beyond any measure, I am sure of that. They have always been there for me but there is always a divide because of my lack of faith. I am really not sure how, or even if, this can ever be overcome. Any advice here would be welcomed, but please move beyond the "open your mind/heart and let god in" type scenario as it really doesn't work for me. More useful would be advice/experiences from people in a similar positions.
I am starting to implement the strategies my counsellor has suggested and so I am going to a singing group tonight. It will be the second time and I feel even more nervous than last week. It was fun last time and I didn't cause any permanent injury to anyone, which is a vast improvement from when I used to go country dancing. The weather is still lovely but I haven't taken full advantage of this. I must do so tomorrow. One other thing that is really motivating me at the moment is a rowing machine challenge at the gym. I am currently 2nd in the standings, being beaten by one of the instructors. I reckon I can beat him but probably won't be able to walk for a week afterwards.
Anyway, if you are reading this and feel moved to do so, please make some comments below. It is a great boost to me to know that people are finding this blog useful.
I am starting to implement the strategies my counsellor has suggested and so I am going to a singing group tonight. It will be the second time and I feel even more nervous than last week. It was fun last time and I didn't cause any permanent injury to anyone, which is a vast improvement from when I used to go country dancing. The weather is still lovely but I haven't taken full advantage of this. I must do so tomorrow. One other thing that is really motivating me at the moment is a rowing machine challenge at the gym. I am currently 2nd in the standings, being beaten by one of the instructors. I reckon I can beat him but probably won't be able to walk for a week afterwards.
Anyway, if you are reading this and feel moved to do so, please make some comments below. It is a great boost to me to know that people are finding this blog useful.
5 comments:
Mike, counselling is a wonderful thing and does have many benefits. I don't think that any amount of counselling can heal the mind of the trauma from country dancing. Keep up the good work. XX
Mike, I have the same issue as you with coming from a religious (very very Catholic) background and being the only atheist in the family. It does make me feel distant from them, and it is something that is never discussed which probably doesn't help. My way of dealing with it is to know that I am doing what is right for me. I can't fake something I don't believe, it would cause far more stress in the long term. I also love seeing my children growing up able to think for themselves, and knowing I always answer their questions honestly. (although I'm not sure how my son has almost got through his CofE primary without getting into serious trouble!) If you have done that for your children then I think you can feel good about yourself.
Clare, that religious divide is always present. My wife is christian too but that isn't often a problem between us. My kids and step kids have definitely all made up their own minds, a fact of which I am very glad. I was sorry to see that your running career might be over, lets hope for a miracle. Are atheists allowed to do that?
I'm going to give Killerton parkrun a go tomorrow Mike, and see what happens. I haven't run since before Christmas so I'm nervous, but I want to give it one more try. So close to that 100 Tshirt...
Hi Michael, all good wishes to you.
Suggestions
1. meditation may give you spiritual bridge you seek.
2. try caffeine withdrawal (raises anxiety at first, for c.5 days, but falls a lot thereafter)
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